Zombie Cuddle: This is not a categorical defense of Lesley Arfin but is maybe an alternative perspective
I think there is a lot of pressure on women in writers’ rooms to be extremely offensive right out of the gate so as to best dodge assumptions that they won’t be “cool” with the non-pc humor of The Guys. I have heard a few female writers talk about this and I think if you’ve seen women in…
For every female writer, or even female person who hangs out a lot with dudes and makes herself “one of the guys” to fit in, there are probably other ladies who aren’t changing their personality or jokes to try to fit in. I’m absolutely certain that I have, on many occasions, made jokes or comments that went beyond acceptable for my peers (girls and guys). I don’t have a good filter for swearing, acceptable dinner conversation, or censoring what I would normally say about sex, and for the sake of my own sanity, I sure hope I’m not alone in this. I’m not saying this approach to the world is always a good thing- I would probably be a mentally/emotionally healthier person if my first reaction to a close relative’s funeral was not “oh my god this is hilarious and should
probably DEFINITELY be used for a comedy bit.” I *know* I’d be happier if those thoughts didn’t happen, unbidden at times when they actually aren’t funny, but only macabre. And sure, my anecdote doesn’t mean what you’ve said isn’t true for some, if not many, people, but I don’t think that that possibility excuses racist shit. More accurately, I don’t think that just because we can see why someone said something offensive we shouldn’t call them out on it- when you’re in the public eye (twitter?), EVERYONE can see the dumb shit you say, and they have a right to tell you to go fuck yourself, even if it’s a (bad) joke, and even if we think you’re doing it to fit in with the dudes in your industry.
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